Dear Kennedy

As I'm nearing the end of my pregnancy and I'm getting more and more anxious I decided I would write a little letter to my baby girl expressing how life was before she got here and how things are going.  So here it goes;

My dear sweet Kennedy,
I don't even know where to start! These past eight and a half months have gone so quickly that I cant even imagine how fast the next eight years will go! We have been so anxious to meet you and see who you look like and see what your personality is! You already do have a fun exciting personality as it is, I cant wait to see it in person.  You already love your daddy so much! You always seem to get super excited whenever he talks to you or when he rubs my belly, its like you can just tell when he is around! I think you do that just to make him fall in love with you even more and to wrap him around your little fingers even tighter! We sure love you and we sure cant wait until your arrival.  Its only two and a half more weeks until my due date, but we are so hoping that you will get here a little earlier.  We got to see you the other day in an ultrasound and you were stubborn like always.  We wanted to see your adorable little face but you had your hands in the way.  Its alright though because we will see you soon.  The doctor said you will be a little on the bigger side which makes mommy slightly nervous, but I know it won't be too bad I just want you here.
What do I want from you? Kennedy you will be our oldest child, which means we will need you to be a great example to your siblings.  You will also be the oldest cousin on mommy's side of the family, which means you will have the responsibility to be an example to all your cousins also! I know thats a lot of responsibility but I have no doubt you will be completely capable of that.  Your daddy and I will try and teach you everything you need to know but I know that you will also teach us so much! We want you to try new things and be an outgoing girl! We want you to be a friend to everyone and to always do your best! When the time comes for you to get married we want you to get married in the temple for time and all eternity! Eternal marriage is one of the greatest gifts you could ever imagine! There isn't anything that could ever compare to going through the temple with your spouse, knowing that you will be with your family for eternity! You may never know the importance of temple marriage until you experience it for yourself.  Never let your standards drop for anything! Always be strong in your decisions and keep the Lord on your side ALWAYS!! Kennedy you are our amazing little girl that is already a miracle for us! You have been one of our greatest blessings and I know you will have so much potential! You are all we seem to talk about and all we seem to have on our minds! Everyone is so anxious for your arrival! Now that your Cousin (no name) Ranee's baby was born today, I have been even more anxious than ever!! I'm so ready for you to come and make your amazing appearance! We love you baby girl, keep growing strong and come soon!!
Love always,
Mommy and Daddy!!

Seven wonderful months!

Man I can't believe I am already almost seven months pregnant! They have really been amazing I have loved every second of carrying this little miracle! Everyone keeps telling me to just wait until I'm nine months pregnant, to tell you the truth I honestly cannot wait! I know it will be hard going up and down the stairs of my apartment, and walking to and from class all over UVU's campus, but I cant wait! I'm so excited to be able to hold my little girl in my arms for that very first time! I cant wait to bring her home and show her off to everyone in the ward! These months have gone so fast I can't even believe it! I have loved watching my belly grow and get bigger! I have also loved watching all my baby's kicks and hiccups! Being pregnant is such a remarkable experience! But having our little girl will be an even more phenomenal experience!
Life has been pretty amazing here! We moved back from Wyoming a couple weeks ago.  We spent a week at my house in Ephraim just hanging out with my family.  We then spent a couple weeks living with Jordan and Jill ( Davy's cousins) since they were wonderful enough to let us stay there since we were homeless for a couple days.  For labor day weekend we went camping up Manti canyon for three days! It was a great trip and so relaxing! I love camping in the mountains and just being able to spend time with family! Davy was sick the first night which was really hard for me because I wanted to be home taking care of him but I also wanted to be camping.  He finally made me go up the mountain and I came and got him the next morning when he was better.  The trip was amazing and I loved it all especially when he came up! On Wednesday Sept. 5, we got to move into our apartment! Its a little smaller but there is so much storage space, which is something we need lots of right now where we have so much baby stuff! Its so nice being in our own place again!
I'm so excited for this new chapter in our lives, and I know it will be here before we know it! Thanks everyone for your love and support and all you have done for us! 

Its A GIRL!!!

A little less than a month ago we found out that we are having a precious baby girl! Davy and I couldn't be more excited!! We have decided to name her Kennedy Jane Allred! I couldn't be more anxious and excited! On the day that we found out we were having a girl our doctor thought she saw something on her brain.  David and I were super nervous and scared of what could happen.  Our doctor told us it could be a cyst, but that we shouldn't be too worried.  Of course we were very worried we just wanted our baby to be healthy.  Our doctor then told us that we needed to see a specialized Radiologist, so we did a couple days later.  At our Radiologist appointment we got another ultrasound and found out that everything was perfectly healthy with our little girl.  She was growing just perfectly, her heartbeat was strong as can be and she was cute as ever.  We think she is going to be tall though because her femur measured a week longer than everything else in her body.  It really is an amazing experience being able to see her and feel her.  I love laying in bed at night feeling her moving and kicking me.  We are so blessed and so grateful for this miracle. 

Last week I flew on a plane for my very first time.  It was kinda scary at first just because I didn't know what to expect, but after I settled down it was really fun! I would much rather fly home to Utah than drive the long 10 hours it takes to get there.  I flew home to help my mom with Girls Camp.  For a while we didn't know whether we were going to have camp, because of all the fires around there, and one happened to be right by where we went to girls camp at.  Finally the stake presidency decided we would go up Ephraim Canyon.  It was actually a pretty fun place.  We were very crowded, and things were very different, but it was still a fun time.  I really enjoyed being able to spend time with my mom and both of my sisters, but I did also miss my hubby a lot! Before heading back to the air port we stopped in to see my grandparents for just a minute.  Grandma had to see my baby bump one last time before we moved back to Utah for school.  I got back to Wyoming on Saturday July 14, just in time for the Byron fireworks.  Those are always a blast to go to because you sit only a couple hundred feet away from where they light them off so you get a super cool affect.  On Tuesday July 17 I got a text from my mom saying that my Grandma Brown was back in the hospital and she wasn't doing very good.  I got this text while Davy was playing softball so I was around a bunch of people.  I went off and found somewhere I could just cry where no one would see me.  My parents kept me updated all night and around 11:00 p.m. that night I got the call no one ever wants to get.  I got the call that my Grandma had just passed away.  It was so unexpected! I mean she had been weak and kinda sick for a while but we didn't think she was that sick.  I was just talking to her and laughing with her only a couple days earlier.  She was supposed to be getting better so our little girl would have a great-grandma Brown.  But grandma being stubborn like she always is had to go up and meet Kennedy before anyone else.  She always had to be the first at everything and this was no exception.  We just hope and pray that she doesn't keep her up there past my due date... haha My grandma was brought back to her loving Father in Heavens arms by her sweet daughter Caroline, My baby brother Kody, one of her brothers, one of her sisters and both of her parents.  She looked so peaceful and pain free when we put her in her casket.  We did head back up to Utah, only this time in a car and we were there with my family the next day.  I'm so grateful for a loving husband that is so unselfish and amazing! He took two days off of work so I could be with my family during this time. And If it would have been necessary he would have taken more time off.  I'm so grateful for him and for his personality and always thinking of others.

My grandma was one amazing woman! She always made sure she got each of her grand kids something for their birthdays.  She started Christmas shopping in January and didn't stop until our Christmas party every year.  She always spent her money on her grandchildren.  They were her pride and joy! My grandpa spent every minute the last couple of weeks helping her everywhere, since she was too weak to move.  He is one of the strongest men I know, so every time a tear would trickle down his cheek I would break down in tears.  I'm so glad we stopped in to say bye to my Grandparents before I left back to Wyoming, I didn't ever think it was going to be a goodbye until I die. It really was a rough week having to say goodbye to her, but I know that without the gospel it would have been even harder!

UNTIL WE MEET AGAIN GRANDMA! I LOVE AND MISS YOU!

New Stuff ♥

Wow it has been such a long time since I last wrote! So much really has happened I don't even know where to start.  The school year has come and gone and now its summertime.  Part way through the semester David had to go to Wyoming to work for a week so he could have a job for the summer.  That went well, while he was gone there I stayed with my family in Ephraim since it was my Spring Break, which I really enjoyed.   While he was gone I found out some very exciting news that we had been waiting for, I was PREGNANT!! I found out on a Thursday and he wouldn't be home until Saturday.  It was so hard to keep it a secret from everyone especially him! I went and picked him up from the airport and on his seat when he got back to the car, was a little present.  I wrote out a note that said Congrats Daddy we love you! Then there was a little package with a little baby onesie and some baby lotion.  His face was priceless when I told him.  We are due the day before Thanksgiving and we couldn't be more anxious!
Exactly a week from today and we will hopefully find out the gender of our little miracle.  Its still unreal to me that we will be parents so soon and that we will be seeing out little baby before the end of this year! My pregnancy really has been pretty easy.  Yes I have been sick and yes I have thrown up but I figure that is just the way that the baby has to remind us to take care of ourselves because they are in there and they do need good things.  Its so amazing how many things have to go just right in order for the baby to be born healthy and yes I do worry about it, but I know that God will bless me with the baby that is just right for us. 
Now back on track... After school finished we moved back to Wyoming for the summer.  David has a really good job here so that's why we came back.  He really enjoys what he does and I'm hoping we can get him a similar summer job in Provo next year.  This is our last summer coming back to Wyoming for the summer, particularly because it would be really hard moving everything back and forth plus have a new little baby.  David and I both decided this when we first got married and I feel it is the best choice.  I have been trying to get a job for this summer and I have had a couple of interviews but I haven't heard back from anyone yet.  Its kind of hard for me being here because I am away from my family and I get really bored and depressed here just because I never know what to do. Its alright though because I know that it helps us out financially and so its worth it.  I just really wish I could find a job to do so I can get out of the house a couple hours a day. 
We are hoping to become apartment managers in the fall to help us even more with finances but we don't know if that will work out.  It really would be awesome if we could pull this one off but we will see!
With all these life changes coming so quickly, we have a lot to prepare for.  We have so much we need to get ready for in the next couple months but mostly we have so much to be grateful for! I'm so excited for everything to happen and I just am so anxious for everything!!

Changes

There have been a lot of changes in my life over the past couple years.  I went to my families ward in Ephraim last week and they asked me to talk to the girls in young women's about finding joy in trials.  I thought that I would be able to breeze through everything that I said without and problems just because I didn't realize how big of a deal everything was to me until I got up and started talking.  I cried through the entire thing and I felt really bad just because I couldn't stop crying no matter how hard I tried.  Anyways here I kind of what I said,

After I graduated High school I thought I had my entire life figured out.  I was going to go to Snow College and get my nursing degree.  I was going to marry the man that I was engaged to, my High School Sweetheart, the only man outside of my family that I had ever loved.  When all of a sudden a phone call changed absolutely EVERYTHING!! A soccer coach from a school in middle of no where Wyoming called me and asked me to go play for him.  I didn't know if I should go or not.  I already had all my plans figured out and I didn't want to change them.  But it had always been my dream to play soccer in College, even though I didn't feel I was nearly good enough to play, but it was still my dream and I wanted to take the scholarship so badly.  I took it and that is where everything took a 180 degree turn around.  My family and Colton took a trip to Wyoming and made it a great vacation.  We went to Yellowstone and just had a complete blast.  Finally the time came for my family to leave.  My dad gave me a priesthood blessing that was beautiful, not to mention it was the first time I had ever seen him cry, with the exception of Kody's (my little brother) death.  Everyone was teary eyed and I was practically bawling.  This was the first time I had ever been this far from my parents, and I didn't know anyone at all! I almost backed out and just went home with them because I was so afraid of the unknown. I felt there was no way I could do this! God gave me a task way too hard.  I knew my family and Colton were both just a phone call away, but it really just was not the same.  I didn't have their arms to run to if I was having a rough time and I just didn't think I could do it.  But I decided to at least give it a try.
 Soccer season started off fast and we were in it full fledged. It was rough with all the conditioning we had and just everything being completely different but it was a lot of fun! I got to travel to different states that I had never been to before and I got to meet a lot of new people.  I didn't really know too many people on the soccer team very much because I felt like I was the odd ball in the group.  About two weeks into it all I was so upset from everything, and me being away from my family and I didn't know anyone yet, it was very rough.  I called my parents and asked them to come get me.  They told me they would the next day.  I prayed that entire night and just fought through everything.  I decided to stay and just fight it out a little longer.  I had no idea why God was so insistent on me staying. I didn't know anyone and I wasn't real active in church yet because we had to miss a lot due to soccer games. I felt that was the one way that I was going to make it through was if I became more active in the student ward.  Finally I was able to go to church! It was such a relief, although I still didn't know anyone I was becoming more familiar with everything around me.  I didn't know why I was there but I trusted God did.  He had a plan and He knew what He was doing.
After a few months there things started going downhill with me and the man I loved dearly.  I didn't know what to do.  I was so distraught and it was affecting my ability to play soccer.  I wasn't able to focus or do anything I needed to and things just became way to difficult, I was missing him and I was missing everything we had done together.  I finally couldn't handle it any more and I just had to break off the engagement.  It was the hardest thing I had ever done in my entire life.  I didn't know why God wanted me to do this.  I cried for days and I felt that no matter how hard I tried I couldn't stop.  I still didn't understand anything God wanted from me.  I turned to God and I really meant everything I said! Its amazing how turning to Him for guidence can improve your life in so many ways.  At first I wasn't playing that much soccer.  I wasn't playing in many games and I just became the benchwarmer.  At this time I really didn't understand why God needed me here so badly.  Everything was going down hill and nothing was working how I thought it would.  Until one day my soccer coach decided to put me in shortly after the game started and I played the entire game! This happened for almost the rest of the season until it came time for regionals, he sat me on the bench again and I didn't get to play after all the hard work I put in.
I finally found out the reason why I was in Powell Wyoming.  I met a man that is so amazing.  I fell head over heels for him and I realized God really did have a purpose for me.  I felt that I would never been good enough for him and I felt there was no way he would ever want me. But he did.  After dating a few months and going through a lot together we got married.  We got sealed in the Manti Utah Temple on June 25, 2011.  It was the most remarkable experience ever and I am so grateful for all the struggles I have had in my life. I am grateful for all those who have shaped my life today.  I wouldn't be who I am without you.  I'm so blessed to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.  It gives me the opportunity to go to that castle on the hill and remember the sacred covenents we made with each other and the ones we made with our Father.  It helps me to know that I can be with my family forever and that when the time comes for us to have children that I will never have to say goodbye to them. Life is truly amazing if we only find our maker and turn to Him in our tribulations.  If we don't fail, we don't learn, if we don't learn we don't grow.

Recap!

Wow I sure haven't been on here for a very long time! Everything is going great in my life.  I guess I'll have to start out with Christmas and the big change that was.  We went to my families house the week before Christmas to have a "Pre-Christmas" It was so awesome and we got a lot of great things.  We then headed to Lovell to spend time with David's side.  It was for sure a big change.  It was weird not seeing my family open presents and seeing their bright shinning faces early that morning.  It was really hard for me since I am huge into my family.  It was a big change but it was one I was willing to make for such an amazing husband.  We spent about a week there and It was a really great week.  We then went to my house for New years eve and celebrated the new year with each other for the first time.  It was such a fun time! My dad being the jokester he is made my grandma about laugh her self to death, then he started laughing and couldn't stop.  It was super awesome!
The new semester has come and it has been alright.  All my teachers are all very unprofessional and they don't even seem like professionals.  But I guess as long as I am able to get good grades then they will be good enough teachers.
Anyways now that I kind of recapped i'll start talking about something that really hit me hard today.  We had a lesson that the Bishop taught.  It was about leaving our families to cleave unto our spouses.  We aren't supposed to leave them entirely but we need to start raising our own families also.  This was especially hard for me to do especially since shortly after getting married we moved to Wyoming ten hours away from my entire support group.  I didn't know what I was going to do and it was really hard for me.  I had a rough couple months trying to cope with every single difference that had happened all at once.  But guess what I made it out just fine.
Life is definitely different being married and having to combine two completely different ways of life, but it is a journey that I don't regret at all.  I'm so blessed that I am married to such an amazing man.  He has his head on right and he is willing to do pretty much anything for me.  I cant believe that we have been married for almost 8 months already.  It seems like just yesterday we got married, but yet it seems like we have been married forever.
I love life and I wouldn't change all my experiences for anything ever!! Thanks to everyone for all their love and support in everything!! I couldn't make it through life without my cheerleaders.