Wednesday, November 30, 2016

I Found My Outlet!

For those of you that were brave enough to read my first post, thank you! Thank you for your input and support! Thank you for being there for me! I do know that there are people out there that are willing to listen and that are there to talk to. So I thank you for that.

As I was sitting here writing about my experiences I have been having, I was being "that mom".  The mom that only saw the negative things in my kids.  The mom that just wanted to be alone, the mom that snapped at every little thing my kids were doing. I was being that mom I was just explaining in my blog and I didn't even realize it.  I didn't realize it until I wasn't being "that mom".  As I got further and further into writing my feelings out I realized I became more patient, more kind, more understanding, and a better mom.  As I was making myself more and more vulnerable I found I was becoming a better person.  At first I saw my kids a bugging me, yelling, screaming, running around the house, when they really should have been in bed.  But as I kept writing I found the good in them running around the house and laughing.  The girls were actually getting along, they were playing really well with each other.  They were getting all their energy out so they would sleep great.  I saw all of these qualities that just a few minutes before I had missed.  It was amazing how quickly that switch flipped.  I couldn't even believe what I was seeing and how drastic the change had been.

I was really hesitant to posting that first post about PPD.  I would share it to my facebook page then I would delete it.  I did that a couple of times.  I was finally getting ready to delete it for real when Kennedy needed me. We forgot to have family prayer, so I left my phone and went in and had prayer with her.  When I returned I already had comments on my post, I still second guessed ever posting it because of how vulnerable it made me.  I really put myself out there and I didn't like how uncomfortable it made me.  But as I woke up  this morning I felt such a heavy burden was lifted up off my shoulders! I felt so much lighter and I felt like it was a new start.

So as I battle with this I hope to not only help myself overcome these feelings inside of me, but I hope to inspire those around me and hope to build a strong connection with other people that may be drowning, and not know how to come back up.

Thank you again to everyone for your love and support!

And now some Wednesday inspiration.  This is one of my most favorite talks!

Good things to come

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